Monday, June 11, 2007

Not My Plan

Psalm 31

8 You have not handed me over to the enemy but have set my feet in a spacious place.

24 Be strong and take heart, all you who hope in the LORD

I would say that most of my greatest memories were conceived in the summer months. The summers of my teen years were full of fun and what I call "life lessons". I remember all of my summers being really hot summer. Maybe it’s because I lived near the lake and could go and cool off. It seemed every summer was different and to this day they continue to be that way. No summer has ever been the same and has always had one or two of those life lessons tucked away, waiting for me.

In my later teen years we all wanted to be our own person, we were developing into what our environments had programed us to be. We were products of our surroundings. If you think about it we all are. We do and think like those that are around us. Their were few exceptions to this rule.

At our high school we were know as the "boys home boys". You could spot one of us a mile away. We tried very hard to blend in and some of us were successful in doing this. One of my best friends had helped me to make this transition from the "smoking area" group to the "A-B" group. Although I would go between groups, Amy had taken an interest in me. She says it was my curls. We never dated or fell in love, we were best of friends and still are to this day. Amy had some friends though, that were really pretty. Paula was one of them. Paula had long blonde hair, the prettiest eyes I had ever seen and was chiseled out of a mold that would melt any teenagers heart.

I was in "love". Paula and I would meet up at school and sit under this big oak tree at lunch, talking about everything in life. I was so nervous to be around her, she was so beautiful. Amy would join us from time to time, I think she was making sure I was treating her friend just right and saying the right things. Amy would often coach me on the things women want to hear, what to say, what not to say.

Amy had arranged for us to meet on Friday and Saturdays nights at her house. Amy parents were so nice. They were the first and only parents that I had known to allow a "boys home boy" into their house, let alone around their daughter. We would go over and meet up, sitting in the formal area of the house. First, just talking and then making out. Not the kind of making out of today. This was what I would call "monitored" making out. Amy’s parents weren’t stupid, they kept a close eye on all of us. They were right on the other side of the wall. If I remember correctly there were no doors on this formal living room. They had this beautiful furniture, Paula and I would take one seat and Amy and her date would take the other. I guess you could call it a double date at the house.

Amy’s mom was beautiful also, she had a heart that just breathed love. Her eyes could tell you anything. Her dad was always nice and stern in his commands to Amy. This was a model that later I would use in life.

I found myself dating one of the most beautiful girls in school. This gave me something that I had never had before, confidence. A confidence that would soon teach me a lesson about life and love. Paula and I were getting along great, loving every minute of our teenage years. Then it happened. This tall, long legged blonde walked by us one day. I had seen this girl before but never really notice her, until now. Her name was Gina. Was it this confidence of dating Paula that made me notice her? Was it the fact that she was at the top of the "A" group along with her sister? Or was it the fact that I had Paula and couldn’t have Gina.

I must omit I was happy in my relationship with Paula and had no need to try and date another girl or even look at another girl. Paula was a beauty-queen. Gina didn’t even know my name and maybe that was the problem. I did get the nerve up to try and talk to Gina. She was very shy and quite. She was not a talker and didn’t seem to be interested in me so I backed off and continued my relationship with Paula. But there was a problem. A problem that I had not foreseen.

Amy had found out that I was wanting to talk with Gina. I will never forget standing under the walk way at the entrance to the school. Amy told me that it wasn’t right to try and talk to Gina and say your in love with Paula. After all Paula was one of Amy’s best friends but so was I. Was she going to turn me in? Would she tell Paula? All I had done was try and talk to the girl, but deep in my heart if Gina would have said yes I would have ended the relationship with Paula. I think this is what Amy knew to. She knew me better than anyone.

The story goes on and Paula ask Amy for advice "what should I do, should I break up with him? Amy, without hesitation said "do it". So that ended my relationship with Paula. There were no hard feelings at all, we remained friends throughout high school and I lost contact with her after we all graduated.

Amy and I still remain best friends. When we get together, it’s always fun bringing up these stories that truly did have an impact. Looking back you can really see God working. A few years later I would meet the woman of my dreams, Lisa and I have been married for twenty-three years now, raised two wonderful daughters and have been blessed with more than enough. God used all of these little things in life to make the big things seem easier that came our way. It’s His plan after all.

I believe you can pick out many life lessons in this story. When we have all that we want we always want more. We always seem to feed on wanting some things that just aren’t meant for us.
You see, God has a plan for your life. Sure this was high school and who could have known what could of happen. Some of my best friends made the most life changing decisions in high school, some decided to have sex and have babies, some decided to kill people, some even decide to take their own life.

This story, as with all of the others doesn’t seem to end. It’s still going. So what can I used here to apply to my life. I suppose you can say two things. One, God is in complete control of your life, no matter what you think or where you are at, your plan has been set out before the beginning of time. Sure we make bad decisions and do stupid things but the God who holds the universe on it’s axis and ushers in billions of star’s every night has a plan and you really can’t mess it up.
The second thing you could say is that every experience in life is set in your path for a purpose, it may not be a mountain, it may not be a valley, what ever it is, these experiences mold us to what we become, how we think and how we react to situations.

In a final word, there is nothing wrong with wanting more, wanting something different or wanting something new. When you have what you have be content and love it, take nothing that has ever happen to you for granite, there is a reason and a purpose behind it. God will use it for good no matter how bad it was or how bad it is.
George Beasley

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